For Lack of Something Better, Here’s a Blogpodge
October 10th, 2009I have nothing specific to report or winge about, so I guess it’s blogpodge time. Try to control your excitement.
I started to write a post entitled “Five Perfect Songs”, in which I explained why I considered certain songs “perfect”: Not too long, not too short, no embarrassing lyrics, flows beautifully, tone and message are in harmony, nobody could perform it any better, etc. After a few paragraphs, I choked on my own boring pretension. So instead of a dozen paragraphs, here’s a quick list of five:
Red Hot Chili Peppers — “Californication”
Stars — “Your Ex-Lover is Dead”
Audioslave — “I Am the Highway”
Arcade Fire — “Intervention”
Radiohead — “There There (The Boney King of Nowhere)”
Be glad for what you missed.
Today I talked to my mom on the phone. Apparently, my sister requested that Ma watch the news in order to find out why there was a Channel 3 van outside her workplace. My mother mused that I would never ask that of her, as I am normally uncurious. In her words, “She sees a fire truck and wants to chase it. You just say ‘Eh, let ‘em burn’”. I know I’ve talked about my own apathy before, but never so concisely.
After one episode, I’m a bit concerned about what’s happening to Dexter. I’m optimistic about John Lithgow, but the writing’s fallen off, and Dexter isn’t as dark and creepy a character as he used to be. I could go further, but someone else beat me to it… and paralleled Dexter‘s decline with that of 24. It makes me wish I thought of it first (because I would have written it better… right? Right?).
I went to Sport Clips to get my hair trimmed yesterday morning. For a company that purports to be just for men, they don’t quite capture the ideal experience. True, the decor is almost insultingly cool — the whole place has a locker-rooom theme. The lobby chairs are stadium seats, each stylist has a locker, etc. The problem is, they over-sell everything. They go out of their way to explain the unique cocktail of tea-tree oil, Head and Shoulders, and rhinoceros sperm that gives your hair that tingly feeling. They give you the stylist’s business card, three referral cards, and one of those stupid punch-card dealies that I never use. Then, they show you that the fancy shampoos are, indeed, on sale for only $7.50 per tiny bottle. Ugh. Guys like sports on television, yes, but they also like to be left the fuck alone. Just cut my hair and let me leave.
I’ve found that for some items, the shittier version is the one I prefer. I thought of this as I was drinking from a styrofoam cup while walking in a gravel parking lot. From what I understand, styrofoam is cheaper — only the independent, low-rent places use them in favor of branded paper cups. But they insulate better, and they don’t leak if you accidentally leave one in your car. As for gravel parking lots, I just like the sound that tires make as they slowly roll over the broken asphalt.
TOP FIVE SONGS THAT WOULD BE PERFECT, IF NOT FOR A TERRIBLE ENDING
Dire Straits — “Money for Nothing”
Steve Miller — “The Joker”
Beatles — “Hey Jude”
Queens of the Stone Age — “In the Fade”
Sunset Rubdown — “The Mending of the Gown”
All right, that’s enough for now. I’ve had a super-busy week, and I think I deserve to watch some college football.
-Darrell
October 13th, 2009 at 10:05 am
Alright…yes I did call Mom to see why the news station was out front of work. I was curious, you have always known this. For amusement Jessica and I chase emergency vehicles and it is far more exciting than it sounds. Maybe we should be injury lawyers….I can hear it now “Wettje & Johnson getting your out of tight spots for 10 years” and our mascot will be a dog with a wedgie. Goldberg and Osbourn can eat my shit.
As for SportClips….now that I don’t work there, and have not for the past 3 years, don’t go there. It is over priced. You are paying for the glitz and not the cut. You can get the same damn haircut at the place in Walmart or a Great Clips. Unless I have any more free haircut coupons (which I doubt I do, but I will check) take your business elsewhere.
October 13th, 2009 at 9:24 pm
There have been two instances where I’ve been notified of a relative’s death within a few minutes of jamming out to “Intervention”. I feel guilty about jamming out to it now even though it’s a great song–like I’m going to cause someone to die by listening to it, which is retarded and irrational (these relatives had already passed by the time I listened to the song and received notification). Now I’ve got this disclaimer thing going on in my head that is all, “HOPEFULLY NO ONE DIES!” when I listen to the song. This lessens my enjoyment of the song. Know any good cures for this sort of ridiculousness?
Was it ever determined why the news station was outside of your sister’s workplace?
Stacks is in Montreal as I type. He’ll be there until Saturday. Know of any groovy locations he absolutely must see while he’s there? He apparently already accomplished finding the best General Tao’s chicken in his entire life.
October 14th, 2009 at 11:45 am
They were outside my work because there was some stupid community meeting about neighbors being pissed off because there is too much air traffic at Falcon Field and it wakes them up or keeps them up or something. I wish I would have known about it so I could have gone over on my break and told them they should not have moved in next to an airport….what the hell did they expect? Airports have airplanes that make noise when they fly over…what a concept. Okay rant over…thank you.